The Most Empowering Daily Practice To Heal Ourselves

The Most Empowering Daily Practice To Heal Ourselves

Grace. It’s my new favorite word. And grace is a powerful daily practice we can use to heal ourselves.

This community attracts women who are very ambitious who want to learn exactly what to do when loving someone suffering from addiction.

Women in our sisterhood say, “Give me the top five steps, and I’m going to get it done. I’m going to ace it, and I’m going to do it to perfection.”

That is a wonderful quality to have. It’s something we all share. We can go through a to-do list like nobody’s business. We can make things happen.

We’re the glue that holds our family together.

But it can also be our greatest liability. We tend to be too hard on ourselves.

We don’t offer ourselves the forgiveness that we are offering others, We are holding ourselves up to a standard that is so darn high. We’re exhausted trying to achieve the impossible.

Occasionally there will be moments where we’ll feel on top of the world because we’re meeting huge goals and we have nailed everything, but for the most part, we‘re falling short of our expectations.

I left my husband who suffers from addiction many years ago, but I still struggle with the desire for perfection. And if it’s not done perfectly, it’s not good enough.

But here’s what I am learning: it’s important to offer grace not only to those we love who struggle with addiction, but it is just as important—if not more important—to offer grace to ourselves. To say, “You know what? We tried. We get an A for effort. And that’s good enough.”

If you’re having a hard time forgiving the one you love who’s addicted and hurting you, I want you to give yourself grace. It’s okay if you can’t forgive them today. Tomorrow is a new day.

You can try again.

If you’ve joined one of our programs: Love Over Addiction, Love Over Mistakes, or Love Over Boundaries, and you’re listening, you’re watching the videos, and you’re filling out the workbook, but you’re still not able to commit 100% to the tools that you’re learning and you’re still making mistakes, that’s okay. I want you to offer yourself grace.

Remember, it’s a daily practice. Take a deep breath. Understand that you are doing the best you can do in one of the most stressful situations that anybody has to go through.

You are living with somebody who is choosing drugs, alcohol, pornography, gambling, or other women over you. That’s devastating. That hurts. That’s painful.

And I’m not sitting here telling you to stay stuck. I’m not giving you permission to go around grumbling and griping or yelling and screaming all the time. I’m saying that it’s okay to take a pause and acknowledge the fact that you are still here and you’re still trying after all this time.

Take a moment to look back at the woman you once were, look at the progress that you have made, and celebrate those small victories you have accomplished.

Let’s give ourselves grace.

This is one word that can heal your life. And it’s also important to offer it to those we love.

But first, start with yourself. Because if you cannot offer yourself grace, how are you possibly going to offer it to those around you? You can’t.

If you’re not kind to yourself, you’re most likely running on empty. You are resentful. You’re frustrated, and you’re critical. And all that negative spew, all that poison that comes out of your mouth and in your negative thinking—that’s a killer. That’s the addiction.

So take a pause today, and offer yourself some grace. I promise, if you learn to be kind and gentle with yourself and treat yourself tenderly and lovingly, you will be able to interact with everybody else in your life with that same kind of tenderness.

If you’re ready, I would love to teach you practical tools that will make all the difference the next time your loved one comes home drunk or high. Imagine not getting into an argument, not feeling angry or disappointed. Imagine not letting it ruin your evening.

That can happen but you have to be willing to do the work. Join our program and get to work so that you can have that relationship breakthrough you know you need.

Explore the Love Over Addiction program

Computer, phone and worksheets of Love Over Addiction program

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Explore the Love Over Addiction: Stay or Go program

Have you ever wondered? Or maybe you know… but you don’t know how. Staying or leaving your relationship is a huge decision. There are questions you need to ask yourself, and ways to prepare no matter what you decide. Find out how to make this decision, even if you’re not ready to make it today.